How Adults.co.uk works

This website holds the guides. The dating itself happens in the members area at members.adults.co.uk, where your account, profile and messages live.

Free and paid, at a glance

Everything up to a conversation is free; reading and replying to messages is what you pay for.

Free members also see adverts in the members area. Optional paid extras, such as profile boosts and the ID badge, are separate; the prices page explains them.

1. Join

You'll be asked for an email address, a password and your date of birth. Adults.co.uk is for over-18s only. If you sign up through a VPN, you'll also be asked to complete an ID and selfie check before you can carry on; our profile checks page explains it.

The site will email you at that address, so pick one you're happy to see those emails in. If discretion matters, a separate address kept just for dating is a sensible start; our page on privacy and discretion has more ideas.

2. Build your profile

Your profile is what other members see: your photos, a few lines about yourself and what you're looking for. Every photo is reviewed before it appears. What you write is not checked, by us or anyone else, and the same goes for everyone else's profile.

You can set details such as who you're looking for, an age range and a distance. A good adult profile is frank without being graphic. Say what kind of arrangement you want, what matters to you (discretion, sexual health, chemistry over a drink first) and what you won't consider. People who are clear from the start waste less of each other's time. Our guide to talking about desires and limits helps with the wording.

3. Browse and show interest

Browsing is free, and so is receiving interest from other members. Take your time. A profile with a thoughtful description and a few genuine photos usually tells you more than one with a single glamorous picture and nothing else.

You're not only seeing people who joined here. Adults.co.uk shares one member database with partner sites in the same network, and profiles show which site a member joined through. The same applies in reverse: members of those sites can see your profile and message you.

4. Upgrade to read and reply

Reading and replying to messages needs a paid membership. You choose one in the members area, which shows the price of each option before you pay:

The members area shows the exact price of each plan before you pay. Memberships renew automatically until you cancel in Settings > Billing. Your card statement shows the billing name displayed at checkout.

Every membership renews automatically until you cancel it in Settings > Billing. Your card statement will show the billing name displayed at checkout, so note it before you pay. The prices page explains renewals, refunds and the optional extras.

What a good first message looks like

A good opening message is short, specific and easy to answer. For example: "Your line about wanting a proper drink first made me smile. I'm the same. What does a good evening look like for you?" It shows you read their profile and leaves them room to say no.

Skip the explicit opener. On a grown-up site it usually ends the conversation before it starts.

When you meet

Keep chatting in the members area until you're confident the person is who they say they are, then meet somewhere public first. Our first meeting safety plan covers the practical side, and the safety page lists who to call if something goes wrong, from a scam to an assault.

Leaving

Cancelling and deleting are two separate steps:

1. Stop paying: cancel in Settings > Billing.
2. Remove your account: open your avatar menu, go to Settings and choose Delete Account.

Cancelling doesn't delete your profile, so if you're leaving for good, do both. The contact page covers log-in problems and billing questions, and the key facts page puts the company details in one place.